A few weeks ago I wrote a blog entry brimming with optimism about several prospects for some hot sex, one of which was a guy on Adam4Adam. I should have known that speaking of this so optimistically before it happened was only going to jinx me, and boy did it! None of those guys worked out…not a single one. One of these “prospects” (who will henceforth be referred to as “hairyassboy”) engaged me in a 4-day online conversation that left me COMPLETELY frustrated. Enough time has passed that know I can actually see the humor in this exchange of communications between two guys on very different pages (me, the guy who wanted to meet in real time for sex; and another guy, who wanted to talk a lot about it).
me: You look like a lot of fun! What type of ball play do u like?
hairyassboy: stretching, tickling, licking, massage, light pulling, seperating
me: do you like to have your balls played with while a dildo is working your hole? 😛
hairyassboy: yeah that would be hot. what gear and toys do you have?
me: dildos, nipple clamps, I’m really good at tying up balls with cord, leather flog, paddle
hairyassboy: nice. do you have a play room? sling?
me: nope, afraid not, and I cannot host.
hairyassboy: thats cool. what are you ass toys like? how big/vibrate?
me: I have several different sizes, but none that vibrate. What toys do you have?
hairyassboy: i dont have anything really.
me: can I see your private pic?
hairyassboy: yeah sure
me: nice ass! Shall I bring over my toybox? :-))
hairyassboy: sure. so what all do you have? can you unlock also?
me: I’ll bring everything and you can tell me what you like.
hairyassboy: how much stuff do you have?
me: or we could meet at the grocery store and you can pick pick out a nice zucchini or cucumber :-))
hairyassboy: haha. that would kill. do you have thin stuff?
me: yes, I have a skinny one.
hairyassboy: cool. so how do we do this? do you like to edge?
me: would love to try it. I gotta sign out for a while to shower and let my dogs out. Let me know where/when we should meet.
hairyassboy: ok cool. let me figure out whats going on with my day and i’ll shoot back.
me: let me know….
hairyassboy: i have to meet a friend in about an hour. are you free late this afternoon/evening? ive been edging myself too. i’d like to try to do a long edging session with you. do you like to massage?
me: I think my best window of opportunity has past for today. Maybe we can meet up sometime during the week?
hairyassboy: damn. not free anymore? the week could work.
me: I’m free tomorrow ’til about 7pm.
hairyassboy:ok cool. wish we doing this now in the rain.
me: sorry, I gotta be somewhere at 5pm.
hryassboy: cool. look for me tomorrow
me: I misread my work schedule, today isn’t good, what about tomorrow?
hairyassboy: tomorrow is sort of up in the air right now. let’s touch base either later today or tomorrow afternoon.
me: thanks, give me a shout when you know what your Tuesday availability looks like…..I won’t be available after 7pm, but earlier should be fine for me.
hairyassboy: thats cool. and same with tonight im guessing.
me: so where and when would you like to meet?
hairyassboy: you said you’re free till 7? do you want to meet up somewhere or do it anonymous?
me: it’s your call. If you want to meet in public first, that’s alright with me. Otherwise I can come to you.
hairyassboy: what time is good. do you want me ass up here?
me: how about 1pm (one hour from now)
hairyassboy: i think that’s good. let me check on one thing. how long do you think it will go for?
me: until you can’t stand it anymore and blow your load. >:-))
hairyassboy: back. ok so how is this gonna go down man?
me: I meet you at your place?
hairyassboy: yeah sure. can u let me know how we will start? and also how i should wait here
me: I’m really more of a spontaneous sort of guy, but if you’ve got a planned-out scene in mind, I’m all ears. I just thought I’d come over and stroke your dick and then we could move on to some dildo play?
hairyassboy: i def think a hot setup is fun and love anonymous. how many dildos are you bringing?
me: maybe I’ll get back to you another time….my schedule is flexible, but I do have work that has to get done, so I can’t spend an endless amount of time with sex chat. If you decide you’d like to meet in person sometime, maybe we can just have a conversation about it, and see where that goes.
To understand how genuinely frustrating this was for me, you should understand that it generally took him a very long time to reply to most of my messages shown above.
I have actually seen hairyassboy online several times since we had this 4-day exchange of messages. I decided to pass on making any further effort to chat with him. I got the very definite impression that he had no real intention of meeting me….he was just going to see how long he could engage me in online sex chat. Am I missing out on a hot sexual encounter? I suppose that perhaps I am, but some people are just TOO MUCH WORK.
P.S. hairyassboy is not an actual profile on Adam4Adam, but the conversation I present above is real! (Truth is stranger than fiction)